Can't focus

on anything but babies, babies, babies. Not good when your going to school and have a few weeks left. I feel like my mind is in over drive thinking about babies. I just want to be a mom so badly. This is hard! I always try to stop and think what would we do if we had a baby tomorrow, I feel like we wouldn't be ready. Would I work, would I stay home, AHHHHHH lol. Still no word on the adoption. I feel like we are just at a stand still. I got a call from chris old doctor that they are mailing this paperwork about his head but still no word from the DUI counselor. I feel like we are never going to get approved. I don't know whats going to happen if we can't get that paperwork. Hubby and I have been talking more and more about doing IUI with donor sperm. I did find out that it is a tad cheaper here but DS is so expensive. $6150 for the vial and $200 for the shipping and thats just the the sperm itself. If you want extra info on the donor you have to pay for that to. I wish this wasn't so hard or expensive. I think I'm going to make the apt with the new doctor. At least see what he thinks and my new insurance should pay for the apt and first us and bloodwork, then we'll have to pay for the US and BW before the IUI and the IUI itself. Hubby is freaking out about money and isn't totally sold on it but I think I've made up my mind that this is what I want. This doesn't mean I'm not scared to death but I'm trying to push thru. I'm just scared it won't work. We barely have the money (not really but I'll figure it out) and what if it doesn't work? It does kinda freak me out to have another mans sperm in me but I think I'm more scared it won't work than anything.